Kirk Ferentz and ESPN Play it Safe

UPDATE: ESPN's frontpage is ridiculously funny. It is akin to the Government launching their own counter-culture anti-government division and telling you that you no longer need to be a part of that protest group, because we've got everything you need right here! Don't mind that smell, it's just establishment...

Well, he has spoken. Kirk Ferentz did an interview with Adam Rittenberg for the WWL, and it was...um...fluffy?

Not that we've come to expect anything more from ESPN, but there was not a single poignant question relating to the alleged rape in that whole bunch. The most telling?

Do you expect the second investigation to change anything?

KF: I'm only involved in certain parts of it and I can just tell you this. Everything I'm aware of was done with concern for the young woman, also concern for the alleged parties involved. That's really all you can do. From what I know, at least everyone on campus exhausted every possible option available to them and everything was handled very well. The Regents already came to that conclusion after an investigation, and I'm very confident they're going to come to the same conclusion down the road. The only other aspect of that, I would not be surprised if they readjust the procedure one more time. That may be a result of this investigation. But that's up to them. All the parties involved could do was follow the procedure that's been laid out.

What could that adjustment be?

KF: I have no idea what that might be.

Right, Kirk. You have no idea what the adjustment might be. Here's a hint: why not get the POLICE INVOLVED? And Adam, you're really ok with that answer? Come on, dude, why didn't you press it?

Here's a question I'd like posed to the WWL: Why are you treating this with kiddie gloves? If this were Ohio State, USC, Michigan, or any number of programs, this would be a HUGE deal, and there is no way you'd just have Rittenberg spend 20 minutes on the phone flinging marshmallow questions. Hell, you'd have Outside the Lines and the Sports Reporters in one giant orgy of soft focus outrage.


But since you decided to take the "little-read pseudo-blog" route, any ONE of the following questions would have been good to ask:

Why weren't the police informed?
Why did you have somebody move into a crime scene?
Were you aware that the protocol in place involved an "in house" solution?

Rittenberg does an admirable job discussing the recent off the field issues - even going as far as to ask how Kirk plans to address the discipline issues that have plagued the team. However, the questions about the pending rape allegation were softballs at best. If Iowa AD Gary Barta is "looking forward to addressing the specifics of this case publicly" then I'm looking forward to hearing them, because Ferentz and ESPN both fluffed it up for this piece.

Waiting on an Explanation

No need to delve into the guts of the case here. If you're reading this site, you undoubtedly follow such things to an unhealthy degree, and thus, already know. If you are in need of a recap, please click here, and here, and here.

The upshot of the whole thing is, unbelievably, that a rape alledgedly occurred at the University of Iowa, and the university followed a procedure that did not include notifying the police. Allegedly, allegedly, allegedly. The very fact that there was an allegation is disheartening, the fact that the university had an "in-house" solution is downright despicable. As an add-on, the University also had the alleged victim living in the SAME BUILDING on the SAME FLOOR as the alleged assailant. This goes beyond fail, and into gross incompetence.

We fully support BHGP's call for the resignation of everyone who even could have been involved. Everyone.

We are also looking forward to Iowa's explanation, if only to laugh at how truly insufficient it will be.

State of Game Takes off the Kiddie Gloves

We were just going to use the "BHGP has gone too far" segment as a segue into a belated LTP potpourri awards posts in which we ripped on BHGP for picking all Iowa folks, and revealed our own picks. We were going to do it nicely. But Hawkeye State decided to bring out the big guns, so we'll go ahead and rub his nose in it.

I don't have the skills to make a slideshow on youtube, mostly because I

a) have a girlfriend
b) have a life
c) wasn't in the A/V club in high school
d) don't spend my Saturday nights playing Halo 3 while gazing at a life size fathead of Richard Simmons that is up to not only inspire me to get off my fat ass and move around a bit, but also satisfies my deeply buried homosexual tendencies brought on partly from watching Iowa Football all those years, but mostly because the one time my black heart was actually with a woman, I had no swelling whatsoever in my gold pants.

Here is what I can do. I can embed a youtube clip that somebody else made (Plagerism right? Kinda like ripping off that already established Michigan video to begin with?) that I feel encapsulates the Iowa football experience in a nutshell:



Iowa Football: Where nothing happens. Nothing, atall.

The little video you made was cute, given that Iowa has won a grand total of 10 games against Michigan. That's not playing the "in the last 50 years" or "since the modern era" card. That's 10 games since the dawn of time. My guess is that Hawkeye State originally set out to make an "Iowa football: where amazing happens" video, found that he couldn't find any pictures of Iowa triumphs (here's a hint: they don't exist), and did the next best thing.

The road to OPS may very well go through you, HS - but that's only because you two are elephant-walking around so damn much that I get a two-for-one that I never, ever wanted to see. And dude, I'll take James Dean over Steve McQueen any day of the week. I notice you didn't bring Champ's pic into this, because the Godfather smokes McQueen all day long, twice on Saturday. You think we copied you on the "black and white badass celeb pic" for our own profile? That's cute, but the truth is we didn't really even know your site existed before we started this one, mostly because we haven't heard anything from Iowa Football since 2003.

Des Moines… it’s in Indiana or something

Little Spinal Tap for everyone there to get us off on the right foot. And yes Iowa faithful, I know that the University of Iowa is located in Iowa City, thank you.

Hey, remember when there were at least two separate occasions last November where Michigan fans like me were trying to come to grips with LOUD rumors of Kirk Ferentz to Ann Arbor?? Oh I can shrug and smile now, but those days were some of the worst in recent memory. I recall how it began…

(A gentle waking to a cool gray late autumn/early winter morning)… stretchhhhhhhh… yawn, scratch, perhaps I’ll have some Smart Start today, that Special K just doesn’t get it done anymore, ah good the coffee’s done, let’s just set this down while I just check out the ol’ rumor monger machine shall we? JESUS TAPDANCING CHRIST! Who in the name of Bump Fucking Elliot are we looking at? Kirk Ferentz… (hits refresh)… not joking… (refreshes again)… but wha… no way… we’ll be fine, I’m going to enjoy this fine java while I wait for the “har-har just kidding here” PBBBBBBBBBBBBTTGHHHHHHHH! Oh it burns! It burns!! Wait what do you mean there’s a goddamn flight that was tracked from Cedar Rapids to Ann Arbor, they have PLANES in Cedar Rapids?! It’s not conceivable, (refresh) (refresh) (refresh) repeat for 8 hours a day until rumors subside… which oh by the way was somewhere near 9045 years… Not since Tim Dwight scared the ever loving bejeezus out of me in ’97 have I been that terrified of something from Iowa... so anyways, yeah on to the Hawkeyes, alright!

1. One thing the media will harp on that is ridiculously off base – Let’s get back to our friend Kirk Ferentz for a quick second… The media seems to constantly portray this guy as a worker of miracles with “lesser talent”. Hey, I’ll give him all kinds of credit for his three year run that started in ’02, but uh… other than that burst of success, in the always fair and objective game of college football, his last three seasons have left a lot to be desired. That’s 1-game-above-.500 level of desire by the way. Iowa had a top 10 or top 15 recruiting class in 2005, they should be coming into the prime of their careers this season, but uh… through either horrific character misjudgment or even worse luck with injuries, I wouldn’t say that the excitement is brimming over at this point. I’m not saying Ferentz is to blame for all of the problems with the program, but uh, there have been more than a few, and at some point don’t you have to look at the coach? The media won’t, they’ll extol him as a great molder of talent if Iowa shows as much as a pulse this season, but I wonder how much patience Iowa fans really have at this point.

2. One thing the media will completely ignore that is integral to this team's success – First things first, Iowa gets out of playing both the Buckeyes and the Wolverines this year, which is the greatest gift the Big 10 can give to a team. Actually on the field the slotted starters on the O-line are looking like they’ll play different positions from where they were respectively last season. Seeing as how Iowa’s O-line was somewhere between god-awful and “Michigan-against-Ohio-State-Non-Existent” last season, perhaps this shakeup was the only real option/idea the Iowa coaching staff had. Oh, yeah, and THERE’S A BATTLE AT CENTER!!! YAH!!! Kirk Ferentz has a freshman son who might play center someday too! Holy crap! Center love all around!! In all seriousness though, there is experience here, if they can somehow be even a serviceable unit, Iowa will be a much better offensive football team than the 2007 version… which was 110^th in the nation in scoring offense (wow). Oh oh, and the scoring defense? 12^th… I’m sure the team meetings were a BLAST for the O last year!

3. Most important contributors on each side of the ball – In case you haven’t noticed, I LOATHE picking the quarterback in this section, but I have to here. Iowa has no discernible talent at running back that is capable of even walking right now. They do however have a surprisingly well stocked cabinet of wide-receivers though. They will be worthless if Christensen or Ricky Stanzi (which is perhaps the most polar opposite name of Bronco Nagurski that one could ever have) can’t get them the football. The rushing game will also be hapless without the threat of danger through the air. Defensively? Iowa has always had at least one linebacker on the field that is nothing but a guy who goes out and flat out makes plays, and I don’t think there’s any reason that’ll be different this year, and the few times I saw Iowa play last season (key word: FEW) A.J. Edds looked impressive.

4. Area that scares you as an opponent – Iowa was on their way to closing out the season on a bit of a high note before choking on applesauce against Western Michigan. Perhaps the Hawkeyes were starting to figure a few things out? They scored 120 points in their first 8 games and managed to get to 102 in their final four… I’m reaching I know.

5. Area that makes you salivate as an opponent – Hey did you hear that Iowa lost 17 players from its 2007 roster? Oh, oh yeah, and right now this is their running back:

I mean when I hear Paki O’Meara, I guess this comes to mind…

6. Random factor that you think will come into play this season – Remember how Iowa had that bit of success years ago and all of a sudden they were the chic pick every year with Drew Tate to be the team to beat in the Big 10… and they pretty much were as far from that as possible? Well now with the glare of expectations out of the way, perhaps Iowa will have the chance to sneak up on some people. If they get any kind of a running back, the offense has nowhere to go but up.

7. Overall Record – 7-5, Iowa heads back to the bowls, but not by too big of a margin.

8. Final Big Ten Standing – There are a number of teams in the conference that are simply more complete football teams than Iowa right now, missing out on Ohio State and Michigan is a gift, but I still don’t think Iowa is going to be much more than a .500 Big 10 team. Call it 4-4 again this season, which I’ll say is good for a big ol’ tie in the middle of the conference in the 5-6-7 range.

9. Bowl Game Destination – I guess that’d mean either the Motor City Bowl or the Insight Bowl??? Something like that…